"Where've you been?" is a question you could be asking me. I haven't posted anything to the blog so far in 2008... and quite frankly, I've been seriously considering quitting. According to Google Analytics, I'm getting maybe a half dozen vistors per day, and half of them are looking for Quick Logger Plus (which, I'm sorry to say, is pretty much abandonware at this point, but that's a topic for another post). I don't feel like I've got much of an audience for Music Video Thursday (aside from my youngest daughter who is completely nuts for Queen), which makes it kinda hard to keep the motivation up for it. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to can it, but chances are that we've seen the end of regular posts here for the time being.
Having said all that, I've got some motivation for posting today. It's Valentine's Day, and I've been thinking back to the past - about 14 years ago, I was dating a girl who I was crazy about, and when Valentine's Day came around, I wanted to get her something special. I was at university at the time, in the middle of my comp. sci. degree, didn't have much spare cash, and didn't have much self-confidence. I agonized over what to get her, and finally ended up buying a cheap little "bouquet" of plastic flowers (with a little mylar balloon and, if memory serves me correctly, a small teddy bear) in a little basket or pot from a seller who had set up a table in the tunnel between Arts and Place Riel (at the U of S). Within minutes of buying it, I began to suffer from an acute case of "buyer's remorse" - I began to worry about how it looked, if it looked cheap, and most of all, if my girlfriend would like it or not. By the time I got home and got ready to go out, my stomach was churning, and I had convinced myself that my relationship with her was as good as over - what kind of stupid lunk buys something like this for someone special?
I don't remember much about that evening with her, except this: I gave it to her, I think I nearly broke down crying over how nervous I was feeling, she loved it (not because it was fancy or classy or anything like that, but because I gave it to her), and suddenly all my fears dissolved into thin air. Not too long after this, I proposed, she said "yes", we were married, and the rest (as they say) is history.
So, tonight's music video goes out to Kristen, who has been there for me, helped me believe in myself, tolerated my neuroses, calmed my fears, and loved me. This is one of her favorite songs, "Where've You Been" by Kathy Mattea. I'm not normally a country fan (as you may have noticed by the selection of music that's been posted here), but this is for her:
Happy Valentine's Day, Kristen. I love you very much. I may not have many other visitors to my blog, but you're the one visitor who truly matters to me. And I'm just not myself when you're away.
And now to see if I can keep it together long enough to surprise you with this. Hopefully I can make it through supper without you wondering why I'm so nervous. Some things never change. :-)
UPDATE: Found it!